The Devil's Secret
by DistantThoughts
Summary: Ponyboy gets placed into foster care after Social Workers come to check on them. He gets placed with a family with a dark side. Abused and neglected will Pony be able to survive? Read warning in Ch 1!
1. Chapter 1 Devils Advocates

**Authors Notes:**

This chapter has been edited, 8.12.10

This fic was inspired by my own experiences in the foster system. Thankfully, I was never abused to the extreme but I met many others in the system who were, including my best friend (at the time).

I should point out, foster care isn't all evil. Just some people in it are, the people who the system doesn't _weed out_ before placing innocent children with them. Like in Litzy's fic "Separated"…there really were/are many Kevin's out there. There are a few Crenshaws' out there…sad but true. But there are many wonderful foster family's out there too…in the end I was lucky enough to be placed in one, who later adopted me and are proud to call me there daughter…and my best friend, now my brother, their son.

**Warnings:** Contains child abuse physical and mental (implied sexual abuse), bad language, mental disorder and illness, possible character death in later chapters

**The Devils Secret**

**One**

**Devil's Advocates. **

I haven't seen the sunrise in weeks in what felt like weeks, I haven't tasted the sweetness of chocolate cake in forever it seems. What I wouldn't give to have a piece even one of Sodapops creations, oddly colored and all.

I haven't felt the warmth and comfort of my brother's arms in what feels like eternity.

My brothers and I, we knew this could've happened.

We knew there was also a chance the state would come and take me away and put me in some boys home or foster care...we just didn't know they would.

We just hoped and prayed that it never would.

I no longer have the safety and security of my brothers back in Tulsa. I no longer have my room with Sodapop and his arm to protect me from my nightmares. I no longer have Darry's strength to keep me safe.

I'm alone.

My room is the basement I share with 3 other boys around my age, my bed is just a mattress on the cold concrete floor.

"Michael!" I wince as my foster mother, Janie Crenshaw, yells my name. She never called me by my first name - she said it sounds stupid.

I stand up and I began to walk up the stairs my head down and looking at the steps as I climbed them. I heard footsteps come towards me, I glance up; its just one of the other boys, Anthony. He's a only a couple of years older than me, 16.

We pass each other without a word. I can't see his face due to his hair but by the way he was holding his arm I knew how he felt and what he was thinking.

I shut the basement door behind me and walk into the living room where Mrs. Crenshaw and her husband are.

The Crenshaw's, they _looked_ like your typical nice middle-class family. They had two biological children, twins. A boy and girl John and Joanna 8 years old, nasty little devils who they treated like gold.

The Crenshaw's took in foster children, not because they wanted to do something for the "less fortunate" but they were in it for the money…

"_I get paid good money to take care of you little bastards!"_ Janie Crenshaw admitted to me when the beatings first started.

Mrs. Crenshaw was a tall, lanky woman. Her hair was red and long tied back into a ponytail. She always wore too much face powder that was pancaked onto her face. Her mascara made her eyelashes look like spider legs and her lipstick was always a dull red.

"Hello Michael." Ralph Crenshaw glared at me through his glasses. He was a big guy in his late 40's, reminded me of how I'd picture Santa Claus without a beard. He seemed nicer than his wife, he didn't hit us often but after just two weeks I realized he wasn't as nice as I thought he was.

"Hello, sir." I replied my head still down, every time I looked at him, heard his voice I felt so dirty and so ashamed.

Mrs. Crenshaw got up and came towards me, grabbing me by my arm her nails digging into my flesh. "Sit down." she demanded before let me go pushing me a little towards the couch.

I did as I was told.

I felt both there eyes on me, burning through my flesh. I tried not to shutter. I had learned many weeks ago not to show my fear.

What did they want from me? I did all my chores, didn't I?

I quickly went over things in my head:

_Cleaned the bathroom. Washed dishes. Took out the trashed. We, the boys, cleaned up the house..._

"Michael," Mr. Crenshaw interrupted my thoughts. I slowly looked up to him my eyes meeting his. He stood and came over to me, an envelope in his hands. He sat beside me his hand rested on my leg and I shuttered uncontrollably.

He placed the envelope on my lap and I could see Soda's messy handwriting on the front in blue ink.

I let out a breath and my eyes burned as I tried to hold back my tears. It's been so long since they let me contact my brothers. I felt Mr. Crenshaw squeezed my arm in a not-so loving way.

"Read it." He whispered in my ear. I wanted to pull away but I knew if I did there would be consequences.

I opened the envelope and unfolded the letter and I began reading.

"Out loud." Mrs. Crenshaw barked

_"Hey Pon-Ponyboy." _I began, obeying, _"How are you? Hope everything is fine in Oklahoma City. Been along time since I heard from you. But the people taking care of you said, you've been busy making new friends, school and everything." _I paused. Lies, we were suppose to be home schooled but we never were, only friends I had made were the other boys here.

I continued, _" I miss you something awful Pony. I hate going to bed and not having you there." _I heard Mr. Crenshaw chuckled, _"Darry's gotten depressed since they took you away. But we're trying everything we can to get you back. We love you Pony, always remember that. So do the rest of the gang. __We miss you and hope to see you soon. _

_Love Sodapop. PS. Darry say's hey and he'll write you soon."_

I folded the later, keeping the tears back, as I was stuffing the letter back into the envelope it was snatched out of my hands and I was slapped.

I knew I hadn't done anything, she just liked the slap us randomly. "You know your brothers don't love you, right? Look at me!"

I slowly looked up at her, my eyes meeting her stone cold ones. "No one can love you. You're a dumb, little fucking brat!" With that, she dumped a phone book on my lap, the corner hit my groin and I groaned in pain. Paper was placed on the phone book and a pen in my hand.

"Write them back." Mr. Crenshaw moved the hair from my eyes, "Make it sweet, something like-."

_Hey Guys_, I began writing, word by word what Mr. Crenshaw spoke.

_Good to hear from you, things are great here. Oklahoma City is so much bigger than Tulsa! I made a lot new friends and the other foster kids here are awesome. . My caretakers are sweet but they can't make chocolate cake with directions from a box..._

I stopped and looked up at Mr. Crenshaw to check and see if it wasn't another sick trick, "That's okay. A little humor will make them feel better."

_I miss you guys and I love you too. Tell Darry not to be depressed, I'm okay and it's not his fault. Everything will be okay, I promise. And tell him I hope to get a letter from him soon. Well, I gotta go we're all going to see a movie tonight. _

_Love, Ponyboy._

_P.S. Tell the gang I said 'hi!'_

I placed the pen down and they took the letter from me. Mrs. Crenshaw read it over before stuffing it in an envelope and putting it on the table.

"You're dismissed Michael." She pulled me roughly up from the couch, causing me to drop the phone book, and pushed me out towards the hallway.

"I'll call for you later Michael." Mr. Crenshaw said. I didn't respond I just walked towards the basement door. I opened it, walked down the stairs shutting it behind me; I took my place on my mattress and brought my knees to my chest and I let the tears flow.

I felt arms wrap around me I knew it was Samuel, he's 17 the oldest of us and he's also been there the longest, a going on year two.

"I wanna go home." I sobbed.

He remained silent and just held me.

_How'd I get here...?_


	2. Chapter 2 Devils Servants in Suits

Edits done: 8.12.10

:)

**The Devil's Secret**

**Two**

**Devil's Servants in Suits.**

After mom and dad had died things started getting really rough. My brothers and me had to watch everything we did to make sure we didn't get into any trouble.

"_Absolutely no trouble with the law_" was the unwritten rule at our house. If we got into some sort of trouble, Soda and I would be placed in a boy's home or something.

Darry told us it was wise not to hang around Dally too much since that Grease always has the fuzz on his heels in the first place.

We had to be cautious with Two-Bit and his rough housing, he never did anything major but he's too mischievous for his own good.

Steve, Soda's best friend, I wouldn't be caught dead hanging out with him without Soda anyway. He doesn't like me very much; he thinks I'm an annoying tag-along. Anyway when he and Soda are together he knows not to cause any trouble to put Soda in danger, doubt he would care about me though.

Now with Johnny, he never got into trouble so I didn't have to worry about anything when I hanging around him. After my folks died he became my best friend, he was the only one other than Soda who tried to understand me.

Everything was good between the gang and us, they knew the rules and wouldn't dare cross the line.

Of course there were the Socs; they didn't give a lick about any of our troubles.

Just walking home was a difficult thing to do without getting jumped. They would follow me from school to the east side of town, which was supposed to be Greaser territory, taunting me and throwing things at me.

Every once and awhile they would get out of their signature Mustangs, looking for a fight. I'd try to ignore them not saying a word or lifting a finger. But that seemed to make them more upset and caused them to throw the first punch.

Like today, that's how I got this black eye.

"What a swell time for this to happen." Darry grumbled placing a bag of frozen peas against my left eye that was throbbing and hurting something awful.

"What about steak?" I heard Soda asked.

Darry looked at him, "If you want to go out and buy a steak to put on his eye. You be my guest, lil' buddy." Then he turned his attention back to me and started grumbling again. "Those social workers are suppose to be here tomorrow to come and check up on us. What are they gonna think when they see you looking like hell."

I sighed; Darry sure knew how to make me feel better. "Sorry." I said, holding the frozen peas with one hand.

He straighten up and turned walking out the living room towards his bedroom. "Just keep that on your eye." He called over his shoulder and then I heard his door shut.

"He ain't mad at ya." Soda said, he always said that after Darry barked at me for something, moving to sit beside me and then he draped one arm around me. He placed his other hand on top of mine, pulling the pack of peas away from my eye.

He let out a broken whistle through his laughter. He let go of my hand and I turned away from him. "Shut it. I know I look lousy."

He continued laughing, "You sure do!" I turned to him, glaring at him with my one good eye – only I could get a shiner and still be as threatening as a wet poodle.

I hated the time of the month when the state came by; The rush to clean the house, clean ourselves, and the fight to get the gang out of the house before noon. Well, actually it was just a fight with Two-Bit…this time Darry ended up dragging him out the house by his collar.

Noon loomed closer and we sat nervously on the couch, taping our fingers on our knees. Darry every now and then would reach over and start messing with my hair, like I was some little kid.

"Stop it." I lightly slapped his hand away when he started for the 3rd time.

He'd stop and a few minutes later Soda started.

I pushed Soda's hand away and stood up, making my way to the bathroom. Once inside, I looked at my reflection in the mirror. Boy, did I look like hell warmed over!

My eye looked worst than it did yesterday. I couldn't open it too much because of the swelling and the skin around my eye was a deep dark blue that looked purple. I sighed as I began poking at it, almost as if I thought my finger was magic and it would turn my eye back to normal. "Stupid Socs." I cursed.

As I walked out the bathroom I could hear voice coming from the living room. I peaked around the corner and saw my brothers speaking with the "_Robots in Suits_" as Two-Bit so fondly called them.

It was a man and a woman; both dressed nicely with clipboards in their arms. The man, dressed in a navy color suite had a briefcase resting by his feet. The woman was wearing a maroon colored dress suit with a large black purse hanging from her shoulder. Both faces were pretty much unreadable except for the large smiles they had plastered on. I watched them for a while, before I noticed Darry was looking around the room for me.

I took in a deep breath, stuffing my hands in my pockets and I walked in the living room.

"This must be…" I heard the woman start, she paused and I looked up just in time to see her quickly double check the information attached to her clip board. "Ponyboy?" She came over towards me her hand out in front of her; I took one hand out and my pocket to shake hers.

"I'm Wenona Wilkerson and that's my partner Gerard Smith." I watched as the man, Gerard, made his way over to us to shake my hand.

"Nice to meet you, Ponyboy." I nodded in return and put my hand back into my pocket, looking nervously towards Soda, who motioned me to come to him.

"Excuse me." I said, walking between them to get to my brothers. I shyly hid behind Soda, "Make 'em good away." I mumbled lowly. I'm not sure is Soda heard me though.

I felt my arm being pulled and before I knew it, I was standing in front of Soda and Darry, Darry's arms on my shoulders.

_Picture perfect family?_

_No, just the Curtis boys._

"That's quite a shiner you got there, son." Gerard remarked. I didn't respond. Son? Who the heck does he think he is? Calling me son…

He was being nice and all but I just didn't like them one bit.

"Mind if we look around?" Wenona asked, her thumb pointing down the hallway.

_Yes, we mind. Tell her we mind Darry._

"Sure, go right ahead." Was Darry's reply. I gave an inner sigh. Dammit. I want them gone. Their presences here made me feel weird. Reminded me mom and dad are dead, that any moment they could decide to split our family apart.

I watched as they went into the kitchen, our bedrooms…searching for something. Uncovered electrical outlets? Making sure the pots and pans on the stove had handles facing inward? No, no babies live here. What could they be looking for?

They met in the hallways, talking amongst themselves, ehispering. Like kids on a playground sharing a secret.

"Would you like something? Water maybe?" Soda spoke up, he must've been nervous too.

"Sure, ice water would be nice." Wenona answered with her plastered smile.

Soda pushed me a bit, signaling me to get the water. Why'd _he_ ask them if he wanted _me_ to get it?

I went to the kitchen and I felt two pairs of eyes on me the whole time. Just watching.

It was making me so nervous I kept dropping the ice cubes on the floor.

"You okay there, son?" Gerard asked, I could tell he was close to me. I didn't turn around and just nodded.

Glasses finally good on ice, I filled them with water. I scooped the ice cubes that has fell on the floor and threw them in the sink.

"Thank you." They said as I handed them their glasses of water.

I gave them a smile and finally spoke up, "Would you like to sit down?"

They nodded and we went into the living room. They sat on the couch, while Soda and I pulled up some extra chairs and Darry sat in his armchair.

That's when they began taking out pens, and papers and started asking question. A few basic questions about the family, income, and so forth. They asked Darry and Soda some questions but they were mostly aimed at me.

"How's school going for you?" Wenona asked.

I shrugged "Its good. I'm getting good grades, A's and B's."

"What else?" Gerard asked

What else? "Um, I'm on the track team. Tryouts for next years is coming up, I'm really excited about it."

"Good, good." He gave me a smile and wrote something down. "How about friends?" He asked without looking up.

"Um…well, I have people I associate at school and only at school." I bit the inside of my cheek nervously. "I pretty much have a…sorta, set group of friends." Referring to the gang.

"Hmm." More writing. I looked at Soda; he just gave me a small smile. I looked at Darry; he looked as if he was going to burst out sweating.

"Any trouble?"

Crap. "Not really." I shrugged.

"Oh?" Wenona looked up.

"What about that black eye?" Gerard spoke up again. "Where'd you get that from?"

"Just some bullies at school." I mumbled, "They like to pick on us younger kids." I slouched in my chair, I didn't lie. It was true. I just couldn't go into the whole, Greaser and Soc rivalry, people who weren't from here just didn't understand.

Silence, just the sound of pen on paper.

Wenona broke the silence, "We just have a few more questions. However these questions are private. So, Ponyboy can you come with me?" She stood up and I followed her into the kitchen.

We sat down and she looked a me, a small smile on her face. "Gerard's going to talk to your brothers for a bit, while we're in here." She flipped over the sheet of paper she had been writing on. "Ponyboy, I'm just going to ask you a few questions. Any answers or anything you want to tell me will be between us as long as I feel you aren't causing harm to yourself or others, or even others are causing harm to you, okay?"

I slowly nodded, what type of questions could she ask me?

"Ponyboy, has anyone of your brothers hurt you in anyway?"

I stared at her. Blunt, wasn't she. Was she really asking me this? "Of course not."

"Okay.: She scribbled something down, I tried to look but the angle it was titled made it impossible. "Has anyone in or close to your family ever hurt you in anyway?"

"No."

"Has anyone ever hurt you?" She pressed and I shifted uncomfortably in my seat.

"Besides the bullies at school, no."

"Do you feel safe in your environment?"

"Yes, I know my brothers will always protect me." I answered honestly, I was past being ready for this to be over with.

She then placed her pen down, folding her hands in front of her. "Ponyboy, I know your brothers look pretty strong. Did they tell you not to answer me honestly? Or tell me anything?"

This woman was off her rocker "No! My brothers have never hurt me! A-and never will!" Damn, I was pissed now.

"Now, clam down Ponyboy, I was just making sure."

I glared at her, "Are we done?"

She sighed. "Yes, we're done."

I got up and stormed back into the living room, taking my seat next to Soda's. I crossed my arms angrily, and I felt Soda touch my arm. "You okay, hun?" He whispered.

I just shrugged, not looking at him - if I started now I wouldn't be able to calm down.

Gerard stood up as Wenona came in. "Well, I believe its time for us to go." She said, again the smile plastered on her face.

Good.

Darry and Soda stood, I didn't move an inch.

"We'll get in touch with you if we have anymore questions or concerns." Gerard said, as he opened the door.

They said their good-byes, they called towards me but I didn't reply. I just huffed, drawing my crossed arms tighter to me.

Then they were gone.

"They think ya'll hit me." I said bit out suddenly, tears gathering in my eyes. The room was silent; I looked up at Darry, who was just looking down not knowing what to say at that momeny.

Soda couched in front of me his hands on my shoulders, "Don't worry about it, Pon. If they _really_ thought that, wouldn't they have said somethin'?" I looked in his eyes searching for something. Comfort maybe.

But what I saw worried me, his eyes weren't sparkling with confidence or happiness, he looked worried and it made him look much older than 16…worry didn't fit Sodapop very well.

"I'm just glad they're gone."


	3. Chapter 3 Falling From Heaven

Edits done: 8.12.10

**The Devil's Secrets**

**Three**

**Falling from Heaven**

It had been almost over a week since the visit from the State and we haven't heard a thing from them since. Not a call, a letter or even a follow up visit. Nothing.

We took it as a good sign and started to relax again, "_pulled the sticks out of our asses"_, as Two-Bit said. Things went back to normal; The gang started coming over just like always, day and night. Beer, milk and chocolate cake took it's rightful place back in the ice box and the house went from being spic and span to cluttered - Letting everyone know a house full of boys lived there.

It was Saturday afternoon and I was sitting on the porch with Johnny reading an old tattered book. "_Rebecca_" by Daphne du Maurier, it was moms favorite novel. On the inside of the cover was moms' signature in blue ink;

_Diane Mary-Ann Curtis_

I traced the loops and curves of her name with my finger, a small sad smile on my lips, even now I still missed her so much.

I looked up from the book to Johnny who was sitting on the porch steps in front of me smoking a cancer stick and batting a red ant between his hands.

It was pretty much silent between us outside but inside was a completely different story.

**Bang! Crash!**

I turned my head to peer though the screen door as I heard Darry yell; "Sodapop Patrick Curtis! Steve Randle!" Then I heard Two-Bit laugh followed by another crash. "Ow!" Two-Bits voice echoed outside.

Dallas came outside, shaking his head a grinning with a cigarette dangling from his lips. "Darry's about to kill your brother. He and Steve got into a wrestling match after Soda won Blackjack." He updated us on what was going on inside and brought up a hand to light the cigarette. "Then Two-Bit fell off the couch laughin'. Idiot."

Johnny chuckled and I shook my head. I loved it when all the gang was together like this, it was never a boring time.

"What you two thinkin' about doin' tonight?" Dally asked leaning against the door.

"Nothin' that I know of." Johnny said looking at me.

I frowned. "I have a paper to do."

"Which you should be doin' right now." Darry was standing at the door, holding the screen door open.

"Aw, Darry. Give the kid a break, its Saturday." I heard Soda say from inside.

Darry was about to say something when Dally stopped him, "You have company." I looked in the direction Dally was looking, towards the street.

In front of our house were two cars, both Station Wagons, and stepping out of them were the Robots in Suits. I stood up from the steps and went towards Darry who was standing out on the porch now. He placed his hand on my shoulder, giving it a squeeze.

I noticed Wenona and Gerard but there were two more with them who I didn't recognize. Both males.

They opened the fenced and walked towards us. No smiles plastered on their faces this time. I gulped and looked up at Darry who was staring straight towards them his face unreadable.

That's when I noticed Sodapop was on the other side of him his brows scrunched together in confusion.

The Social Workers stopped in front of the steps and Wenona came up them papers in her hands.

"Ponyboy is coming with us today." She stated bluntly, ignoring the gasps from us. She reached out with the papers in her hands towards Darry, who snatched them, taking his hand off my shoulders.

My eyes widened and my heart began beating wildly. " W-what? Why?" Somewhere beside me I heard the voice of Two-Bit saying: "Where?" Wasn't much of a question either than a demand.

Soda was next to me now, his arms around me. "You're not taking him." He said sternly, his arms tightening around me. "There ain't no reason for you to be takin' him."

I just clung to him, still in shock. Where did this all come from?

"Unsafe...?" Darry screamed suddenly. "What do you mean "Unsafe environment?" He's perfectly fine here!"

"He is a child who obviously has been harmed by someone." One of the other Social Workers said, I hated his eyes they were green and mean. "We feel that he belongs in a safer neighborhood."

"He belongs with his brothers!" Darry returned.

I started crying then, "I don-don't wanna go. I wanna stay with my brothers." I clung to Soda as if my life depended on it. Honestly, I felt like it did.

"Please, Ponyboy, make it easy and just go pack only what is necessary." Wenona said.

"This isn't right you just can't come out of the blue like this and-"

"Its only temporary, Mr. Curtis, we have a court date state up where you can plea your case." Gerard said, trying to reassure and clam us. "I do apologize about this but the decision was made this morning. We have a foster home ready and waiting for him. Please, got pack your things Ponyboy."

I didn't move.

"Pony," Darry took my shoulders, pulling me from Soda "It's okay, honey. J-just go..."

"No Darry. Don't say it, don't let them take me away."

He closed his eyes, and took in a deep shaky breath. "It'll be okay. I promise we'll get you back, baby. I swear.''

I looked over my shoulder to Soda. He was silent. They were just gonna let them take me away to live with strangers?

I pulled away from him, glaring. "Fine." I rushed into the house and into the room I shared with Sodapop and I picked up my backpack dumping all my books and everything onto the floor.

I started stuffing the bag with jeans and shirts. Not knowing if it was mine or Sodas

I can't believe they are letting me go...I let the bag fall from my hands.

They're supposed to protect me. Darry promised me when mom and dad died he'd always protect me.

_Flashback _

_It was a week after mom and dad died. Soda had just moved into my room after my nightmares started. I was trying to focus on my homework, but I was just so tired from lack of sleep and stress. I was staring out my bedroom window when Darry came in. He stood beside me, his hands jammed into his pockets. _

_"I just got back talking with the state folks." _

_"When are we going?" _

_"What?" _

_"They are not letting us stay together. So, when are they taking Soda and I away?" _

_"Why don't you just listen to me? You always jump to conclusions." _

_"So they- they are lettin' us stay together?" I looked at him, and he nodded. _

_"As long as we keep outta trouble. They're gonna check up on us every once in awhile to make sure we're doing okay..." _

_I don't know what came over me then, I jumped at him wrapping my arms around him and cried. "I'm sorry Darry. I'm sorry." _

_He wrapped him arms around me, "You ain't got anythin to be sorry for, kid." _

_"I know, just...I don't know what to say. I'm so happy!" _

_"Me too. I'm always here for you, you know that, right?" _

_I nodded still crying. _

_"I'm going to protect you and Soda. They're never gonna separate us. I promise." _

_I cried and he held me. First time I felt close to him since mom and dad died. _

_End of Flashback _

I cried, in the same spot I had cried then, my hands covering my face.

"Never say Never."

I came out the house; Soda and Darry were talking to the Social Workers and the gang we huddled away on the porch. They all looked at me as I came out, I just looked down at my shoes.

I adjusted my backpack on my shoulders and licked my suddenly chapped lips. My head hurt from crying and I felt exhausted.

I gave a glance to the guys, who just looked at me..."Bye..." What else could I say? With that I walked down the porch steps. Gerard offered to take my bag and I gave it to him, not looking up.

"Pony...I..." I looked up at Soda who was biting his lip nervously. I...I just..." He grabbed me thing pulling me a tight hug. I felt more arms embrace me, I knew it was Darry. They let me go after a few moments. I didn't meet their eyes.

I stayed silent and pulled away from them.

"Pony, don't go like this, please?" Soda begged.

"Pony, we'll get you back. I cain't fo anythin' right now, please understand"  
My head snapped up then, "Understand? I shouldn't be goin'. You promised me."

"Come along, Ponyboy." Wenona said, touching my shoulder.

"You promised." I then walked towards the car, getting into the Station Wagon with Gerard and Wenona.

I sat in the backseat, just starring at my lap as the car began to drive off. I wanted to jump out the car and run to my brothers, tell them I loved them and I didn't want to go...

Beg to stay...

I let the tears fall once again as the car continued to move. I had no idea where it was heading...where I was heading.

All I knew was, it was away from this "dangerous environment", and my brothers who kept me safe.

Away from home.


	4. Chapter 4 Into Purgatory

Edits done: 8.12.10

**The Devil's Secret**

**Four**

**Into Purgatory**

They just let me go.

They didn't fight to keep me with them, they just let me go. Now I know how a baby bird feels when its mother just suddenly pushes it out of the nest, expecting for it to fly.

_I've crashed into the ground._

The whole drive I had my forehead pressed to the cool glass, the glass lightly fogging everything time I exhaled my breath. It felt like we've been driving for hours, but in reality we haven't been on the road for a little more than two hours.

_I want to go home… _

"You're going to be staying with a family in Oklahoma City, have you ever been there?" Wenona suddenly said, jarring me from my thoughts.

I turned to look at her; she had that damned smile plastered onto her face again. "No."

"It's the capital of Oklahoma and its a lot bigger then Tulsa of course-" She continued with her mindless chatter saying things I've known since I was 3 years old.

"—the family you're staying with live in the middle class district of the city," Wenona continued, "their the Crenshaw's, they have two of their own children who are twins, I believe they are 9 or 10. They are also foster parents for 3 other boys around your age."

_Were those boys ripped away from their family too?_ I couldn't help but wonder.

I think she was still talking about this family I was going to be staying with, however I just placed my forehead back against the window and stared out at the city appearing before me.

"_Oklahoma City- City Limits"_ My eyes scanned the sign as we passed it and came across another sign:

"_Welcome to Oklahoma City, Oklahoma!"_

I sighed and shut my eyes pressing my forehead harder against the glass. _I just want to go home…_

We finally reached our destination about 20 minutes upon entering the city limits; a brown single level ranch style home that was at the end of a cul de sac.

I eyed the group of people waiting outside of the home; a man and woman who were sitting on a porch swing, two children- a boy and girl- on the ground with colorful chalks in their hands drawing on the concrete driveway. There was a group of 3 boys, huddled together, sitting on the porch steps. When we pulled up they all, except for the children, stood and gathered at the end of the drive to meet us.

The woman, I believed to be Mrs. Crenshaw, smile grew as we got out the car. She was tall; maybe around 5 foot 9 inches, while her husband who stood next to her, his arm around her thin waist, was a couple inches shorter and but the rest of him…a lot bigger. A lot rounder.

The man stepped forward, pulling his arm from his wife's waist and came towards me, sticking out his hand. "I'm Ralph Crenshaw, you must be Michael."

I nodded taking his hand, "It's Ponyboy. Michael is my middle name." When I said that I could've sworn I saw his wife wince. But, she just came beside me, pulling me into a hug. "I'm Janie Crenshaw. Welcome to our home…Ponyboy."

She turned, calling to the children who were still sitting on the ground drawing. "John, Joanna! Get up and come greet our guest!"

I heard them both sigh and standup in unison.

_Creepy._

They came towards us, holding hands with both their mouths turned down into a bitter frown from being disturbed.

"These are our children John and Joanna, they are 8 years old." They, the twins, just stared at me for the longest minute in history, before saying a simple "Hi."

If Two-Bit was here, he would've joined in the staring contest- probably would've won. Naw, he would've started laughing.

They looked up at their mother, wanting to be excused. She nodded and they went back to their original place on the driveway and resumed drawing.

"And these young bucks," Mr. Crenshaw started, as he pushed his glasses up on the bridge of his nose, a smile on his breaded face, "are our other foster kids; Samuel- he's the oldest, 17."

Samuel, was looking off to the side, and I studied his profile for a bit. He was handsome, like Soda, but distant. He had brown hair, and I believe blue eyes - kind of hard to tell by his profile, but they were dark. He kept his hands stuffed deep in his pockets, as he starred down the street…a hopeful look on his face, as if expecting his family to come down the street to get him.

_Like I hope mine would._

"…Anthony, he'll be 16 in the next 2 weeks…" Mr. Crenshaw continued.

Anthony reminded me of a skinny version of Dallas; dark blonde hair, ice blue eyes and stone cold face. Face that held so much pain, eyes they held hate, and the way he held himself- making him mysterious.

"…and then we have Charles, he just turned 15."

_Ah, great I'm the youngest! _I inwardly sighed. _They'll probably push me around like Steve, calling me a tag-a-long or somethin'!_

Charles, his eyes met mine and he gave me a small smile, and I returned it. He had brown hair and brown eyes that reminded me of Johnny's. All puppy dog sweet and innocent. But he stood straight, with confidence, unlike Johnny who slumped.

Nothing was said for a moment as the silence crashed down along with an uncomfortable feeling.

Mrs. Crenshaw cleared her throat. "Well, how about we go inside?" She flashed me a smile, before looking at the Social Workers behind me. "Will ya'll be staying for supper?"

"Of course we will be staying until Ponyboy is situated, but afterward we will be heading back to Tulsa before dark." Gerald said, and for some reason that sent chills down my spine.

"Aw, well, if you change your minds, my offer still stands for ya'll to join us."

Dust free and spotless, that's the house.

The inside of the house was clean.

_Ridiculously clean_.

The tables were spotless; you could see your reflection in them! The mirrors were clean and crack free, no unknown stains were on the walls, floor or ceiling. I searched for dust while the other boys were taking me to my room, I found none.

"This is going to be our room." Charles jarred me out of my thoughts about the freakishly clean house. I looked at him, he gave me a small smile again as he pulled his suitcase from my hand.

I looked inside the room and found two sets of bunk beds, both pushed against the wall on opposite sides of the room, soild green sheets thrown over them.

The room was the same spotless clean, and made me question they actually lived in here. The walls were a robin egg blue with eggshell white trim at the top and bottom while the carpet was a solid dark blue color. The only furniture in the room was a desk with a chair and two dressers in two different corners.

"Get cleaned up. They want us back downstairs." Anthony said in a monotone voice, and pushed past me knocking me into the door frame.

"You'll have to excuse Tony. He's only been here a couple months…so he's still adjusting" I looked over at Samuel who was leaning against the wall, staring at me. I finally was able to see that his eyes were actually hazel.

"I-Its okay." I looked down at my dirty- once- upon- a –time- white- tennis shoes. I could still feel his eyes on me while I looked around the room, "How…long have you been here?" I asked him.

"About a year…" He sighed and pushed himself off the wall. "a year…" he repeated, almost as if he was convincing himself. "Charles been here about, what- 6 months?"

"Yep." I watched as Charles unpacked my stuff and placed it in one of the dressers. Strange boy, I didn't ask him to do that.

"He likes to help…" Samuel said, as if he read my mind. "Ponyboy, eh?"

"My father named me. I have a brother named Sodapop."

Soda…

"Well…that's original."

"Yeah dad was an original type of person. So…how you get here?" I asked wanting the change the subject from my family.

"I'm from Chicago, the windy city of Illinois." I looked over at him, from Illinois to Oklahoma. Wow. "and…when I was 10, I woke up and my mother wasn't home. I thought she went out to the store or to runs some errands…but she never came back. I was suppose to had gone to live with my moms sister and her husband…but they traveled too much so I ended up going from foster home to foster home. Now, I'm here just waiting for my birthday…"

"Me, I never knew my mom, but my dad was taking care of me. He was diagnosed with schizophrenia when I was 13, and they said he wasn't fit to take care of me…" Charles had his back to us the whole time he told his story. Slowly folding one of my shirts. "They didn't ask me, they just took me away from him."

Samuel sighed, and went over to Charles draping his arm across the shorter boys shoulders. Some things were said in hushed, whispered tones that I couldn't hear. I just stood there and watched them; I didn't know anyone was behind me, until the throat was cleared.

I turned with a gasp to see Mr. Crenshaw standing behind me. His face stoic as he watched the two boys. "Supper is getting ready to be served. Get down stairs."

He looked away from them and down towards me, his frown turning into a cheeky grin. "Lets go to the dining room, okay?" He placed his hand on my shoulder turned me out the room and led me down the hall.

I could here Charles and Samuel walking behind us.

They didn't stay. They, meaning Wenona, Gerald and the others.

They had looked around for a bit, and were sitting on the couch and stood when I came in. "Well, everything looks perfect here. What do you think? Any questions?" Wenona asked me, head titled to the side a little with the damned smile.

"When will I see my brothers again?"

The uncomfortable silence was there again.

"That's what were going to check out when we get back to Tulsa." Gerald said, and put his hand on my shoulder "Don't worry, okay?"

"Will I be able to call them?"

"I'm sure the Crenshaw's won't mind."

"Of course. After dinner, call them and let them know you made it here safely. I'm sure they are worried." Mrs. Crenshaw said and her husband nodded in agreement.

Everyone shook hands, and said good-bye then. I watched them as they walked down the drive, get in their cars and drive away, from the door.

_I was alone…with strangers._


	5. Chapter 5 Cast into the Flames

**Authors Note:**

Yes! I now have my account back and I am so happy about it! A big thanks to "James" of FFN support for helping me these last two days, we went through a lot of e-mail addresses but finally I am back!

Wow, just wow thank all of you for your patience. I can't believe people are still reading this thing. So much has happened since I last wrote anything for this I wish I could've said something but as time passed I forgot all my information.

So, sorry!

**The Devil's Secret**

**Five**

**Cast into the Flames.**

I laid awake that night on the uncomfortable twin bed, twisting and turning. I just couldn't get comfortable no matter how hard I tried.

My mind just wouldn't shut up.

I kept thinking about back home in Tulsa that felt so far away. I kept thinking about my brothers and the gang, wishing I was with them now enjoying a Friday night. But I wasn't and it hurt so much.

I still couldn't believe I was here and I was angry about it, angry with Darry about it all.

How could he do that?

How could Darry just throw me away like this? He didn't even fight for me. He promised he'd protect me and never let anyone take me away.

_"I'm going to protect you and Soda. They're never gonna separate us. I promise." _

He lied.

"P-Pony?" Came I hushed whisper above me, I turned my head to see Charles head hanging upside down looking at me from the top bunk. "You awake?"

"Yeah." I whispered back stuffing down a yawn that broke free, I turned onto my side so I could look at him at a better angle.

He didn't say anything for a long time, he just hung there looking at me in the darkness the only light coming from the moon that shone through the window.

"I'm really glad you're here." He started. "Thanks for coming." Then he was gone. I stared at the empty spot his head had dangled from just a moment ago, in confusion but I didn't get a chance to question him because my eyes drifted shut and I feel into a restless sleep - I don't think I even dreamed long enough for a nightmare to appear.

The next morning I sat with the rest of the family at the table for breakfast; Mr. Crenshaw sat at the head of the table with Mrs. Crenshaw beside him at the corner, the twins at her side. We were squeezed in on the other side of the table with me directly across from Mrs. Crenshaw who spooned eggs into our plates with a look on her face that made me wonder if she was sucking on a lemon or something.

"Eat up boys." Mr. Crenshaw said, smiling while tucking a napkin in his shirt collar, "We have a lot to do today with getting Micheal here situated."

"Sir if you don't mind," I started picking up a piece of bacon. "I'd prefer my first name-"

Mrs. Crenshaw interrupted me when her fork hit her plate with a sharp **clack** "Don't be silly, Micheal is a perfectly acceptable name." She kept that look on her face a strange smile strainning on her face.

_Who did she think she was?_

I quickly glanced her way but before I could open my mouth to retort, I felt someone sharply kick my shin from under the table. "Ow." I glanced up and sent Anthony, who I knew had kicked me since he was the only one close to me on that side, a glare but he wasn't looking at me.

"Something wrong?" Mrs. Crenshaw asked, ignoring the giggling twins at her side, that bitter look still on her face.

"No ma'am." I answered moving my attention back to the plate in front of me. I knew Anthony wasn't keen to me but to already be picking on me, it just wasn't fair.

Breakfast didn't take long and Mrs. Crenshaw left saying she had some grocery shopping to do, taking the twins with her.

"So, what should we do today boys?" The large man asked, sitting down on a armchair in the spotless living room. No one spoke up and I shifted nervously on the couch between Charles and Samuel -

"I still haven't called my brothers, sir." I said biting my lower lip and shifting in my seat again, I could feel their eyes on me and right away I felt like I had said something wrong.

"Why don't we wait for my wife to get back and then we'll talk about that, alright Micheal?"

Again with my middle name, I wanted to say something again but those eyes on me stopped me from saying anything. I just nodded even though I just wanted to race for the phone and call my brothers, to hear Sodapop's voice I know would make everything better.

I had been wrong of course, because hearing my brothers voice made me feel so much worse.

"_How you holdin' up?"_ He asked, I could hear the quivering in his voice like he was holding back his tears or something. He was doing a better job than I was, the second he picked up the phone I had started bawling like a baby.

"I wanna come home." I sobbed into the phone for like the third time.

"_I know baby, we're tryin' okay? Me and Darry are doin' everythin' we can to get you home."_ He rambled on for a long time, so long I didn't even hear it when Darry picked up the other line until he spoke.

"_You'll be home soon enough Pone, I'm tryin' as hard as I can." _He paused then, I could hear the guilt and determination in his voice and immediately all the anger I felt towards him went away. "_are they treatin' you alright?"_

"Yeah, I guess." I sniffed rubbing my face with the sleeve of my shirt, "They are."

"_That's good." They both said at the same time, I smiled when they both chimed in a **jink**._

From the corner of my vision I could see Mrs. Crenshaw standing in the hallway watching me and I knew our conversation had to come to a close. "Miss you."

"We love you Pone, you'll be home soon. Savvy?" Darry said, knowing that it was time to go too. I could hear the gang in the back shouting to the phone and I smiled picturing Two-Bit yelling loudly right next to someones ear.

I was sure a fight would be breaking out soon because of that.

"Savvy." I replied quietly a smile still on my face, I knew they were trying their best to get me home and I would be back with them soon.

Then we said out good-byes and I slowly hung up the phone, holding back the tears that quickly filled up my eyes as I cut the connection to my brothers.

"Everything okay, Micheal?" Mrs. Crenshaw's voice cut through my thoughts causing me to jump, I had already forgot that she was there.

"Yes, ma'am." I answered calming my heart. "Missin' them is all."

I heard her tsk a few times and flinched when her hand landed on my head roughly, "That's understandable but you'll get over them soon sweetie."

I turned to her, looking at the sickening sweet smile on her face that made her look like she was in pain. "I won't need to _get over them_," I flinched again wen she patted my head roughly, "I'll be home soon."

She didn't reply, she just stared at me her cold green-blue eyes seemed to look right through me as she dropped her hand from my head. "That," She bit out, "My dear, will be up to the courts now, won't it?"

She gave me another sickening sweet smile before she turned on her heels, calling out for the twins.

"It's best not to fight with them." Samuel told me later that evening when we were washing the dirty dishes from dinner.

I took the clean wet dish from his hands to dry it. "Why not?" Maybe he could give me some answers to why everyone was acting so weird.

"No, don't wipe them like that." He took the cloth from my hands before answering my question. "Counter-clockwise." I sighed at the direction but did as I was told – again.

"Why?" I repeated.

He didn't say anything while he washed another dish in his hands and Mr. Crenshaw came in to grab a beer from the ice box behind us. The man stood there and I could feel his eyes on us, but he didn't say a word and then he left.

"Because it's easier if you just do as you're told." He gave me the last dish before he turned and looked at me, his hazel eyes locking to mine. "Trust me."

I wanted to question him further but I never got the chance because Mrs. Crenshaw took that moment to come in and inspect our work on the dishes. He kept our eye contact for a long while as if he was trying to tell me something else – I just couldn't understand what.

I've gotten really good with unspoken communication since then though.

**Authors Note**

Just getting it going again!


	6. Chapter 6 Fire and Brimstone

So, in the middle of working on Breaking Dawn my _The Outsiders_ and _Twilight_ fic under my other pen Thoughts of Yesterday; I was like huh, I should write a chapter for this one.

This chapter is **very **short and kinda pointless, I'm just trying to skip time so I can get this thing going.

**The Devil's Secret**

**Six**

**Fire and Brimstone.**

"Micheal!" I couldn't control my eye from twitching as one of the twins, the little boy John, yelled my name for what felt like the tenth time that day and it was barely noon.

"Yes?" I asked glancing up from the book I was trying to read, trying for two days I might add.

John stood at the side of my bed with his arms crossed over his chest his fiery red hair looked like it was standing on it ends as he pouted. "Come play with me." He said stomping his foot.

I had to hold in a sigh, but this was getting old. I had been here eight days now, _eight days,_ and it never seemed like it was going to end. On the sixth day, I suddenly found myself on twin duty and never got a moments peace anymore.

"Where's your sister?" I asked calmly even though I wanted to grab him and fling him out the door.

He just shrugged puffing out his cheeks making his freckles stand out more, "I dun'no." He mumbled.

This time I didn't hold in my sigh, "I can't right now-"

He made a noise, "I'll tell mama." He threatened, puffing out his cheeks more to the point I expected them to start popping off.

Not that again.

I put my bookmark, a folded up piece of paper, in my book to save my page, "Alright." With that I closed my book and allowed him to drag me from my bed. I'd rather stand this little terror then to have to deal with an angry Janice Crenshaw.

_I should've just listened to Sam._

Things started to go weird not long after I had came to the house.

I wish I would've seen things a lot sooner, but like the gang had said I just never use my head to see the things right in front of me.

"What's Tulsa like?" Charles asked me out of the blue one evening, the end of my fourth day away from my brothers. It was Sunday and Mr. Crenshaw had pulled us out of our room to watch football with him in the den.

I had tried to get out of it but Anthony once again elbowed me sharply in the ribs when I opened my mouth. I still didn't know what his problem was with me but I could never get to him to ask him what his deal was.

_Tulsa..._

I looked at Charlie, who was sitting across the room on the floor near the TV, glued to it like he had never seen one before. "Tulsa?" I repeated, a lump forming in my throat at the thought of home. "It's..." I never described it before and I really didn't know how. "It's...home."

Charles just grinned at me, so I guess that was good enough. "Sounds nice." He said, turning back to the TV where some band was playing at halftime, the only part of a football game I enjoyed.

"It is." Even with all its flaws, I missed it so much my heart literally hurt.

"Maybe we shouldn't talk about that, boys." Mr. Crenshaw commented, causing me to jump – I'd actually forgot he was there. He was sitting in his armchair, that was position beside the couch on my side, packing his pipe with tobacco. "It might be too painful for young Micheal."

I watched as he struck a match to light his pipe, "Oh, no sir." I started, "It's fine I like thinki-" but I didn't get to continue my sentence, after he had lit his pipe and blew out some smoke, he interrupted me.

Mr. Crenshaw shifted in his seat, "Well, it could be painful for you sooner or later." He paused to puff a few times on his pipe again, "I mean you might not be able to return to them."

_Might not.._

_Might not return...?_

_I might not return home!_

All I could do for a long couple of moments was gape at him, I couldn't believe he had the nerve to say something like that!

I tried to keep mt cool but I couldn't hold back my temper anymore "I-I will though and soon! Darry promise me-!" again I was interrupted but this time it was not by Mr. Crenshaw.

"Cool it." Anthony snapped at me, grabbing me harshly by my shoulder and giving it a shake. "No one wants to hear about any damn promises or your fuckin' home kid."

"Screw you!" I screamed standing up to face the taller and older teen but Sam grabbing my arm and pulled me back down, quickly hushing me with a look that reminded me of Darry.

"Both of you cool it." He said, sending the same look to Anthony.

"Thank you Sammy." Mr. Crenshaw tapped his pipe against an ashtray sitting on a table beside him. "No need to get upset Micheal-" I took a couple of deep breaths to calm myself, just the sound of him calling me by my middle name shot my temper up a few degrees.

"-I was just saying that because I'm concerned. I've seen so many children get their hopes up only to have them crushed." He reached across the space between the couch and his chair to lay a hand on my shoulder.

I glanced at his short stubby hands but said nothing.

"If I didn't care I would not be concerned now, would I? Hm?" He squeezed my shoulder before letting go and for some reason that made my skin crawl.

He rambled on for awhile longer but I didn't pay a single mind to anything else that he had said until I heard; "Now go up to your room. We will talk about your out burst once my wife returns."

I didn't hesitate and I quickly stood and left the den – all the while I felt the eyes of the other boys on my back.

With only being there for four days, I had not been able to work on my communication skills or I would have known what laid ahead for me.

Sam came in to check on me not long before Mrs. Crenshaw was due to return home. He didn't say anything but I knew he was there but I laid on my bed, with my back stubbornly turned to the door.

"I told you not to fight with them." He finally spoke up.

I just shrugged awkwardly, "I know but he had not right to say what he did." I said, my voice muffled because of the pillow I had bunched up under my head.

"You'll hear worse things than that." I almost didn't hear him because his voice was so low but I did. I finally then turned to face him.

I didn't know what he was talking about. What could be worse than being told you were never going home?

"But why!" I cried, sitting up in the bed I hit the pillow with my fists. "What right do they have?"

My mom and dad were never like this.

They didn't go around enjoying crushing peoples hopes and dreams.

Mom and dad...

If any they were here, none of this would be happening in the first place.

"All they want." He looked at me, almost like he was pleading with me but he didn't say anything at first. He didn't say anything for a long time actually. "Things can get bad here." He finally said with a sigh. "Best to just do whatever you can to keep it good."

My head snapped at that _'Things could get bad here?' _What did that mean?

It couldn't...

Before he could say anymore or before I could ask him anything, the sound of Mrs. Crenshaw's voice floated down the hall, sending chills down my spine making me want to just curl up in a tight ball under the bed.

"Micheal!" She called and I looked at Sam but all he did was shake his head that look still on his face.

He gave me a small smile, "Just listen."

And he was gone.

"Micheal!"

_I just wanted to go home._


End file.
